Who Are We?
by baby8love
Summary: Follow-up to S4 finale "The End in the Beginning" .
1. Chapter 1

**Warning: Spoilers from S4 finale!**

*******

"_Who are you?"_

The words had torn at her like a dagger through paper. At first, she had been so startled by the feeling, she had thought she was having some sort of coronary reaction to all the distress she had been feeling while anxiously awaiting for Booth to awaken. It wasn't until she had felt the wetness down her cheeks that she realized she was crying and the pain she was feeling wasn't physical. Her heart had been broken. Her lips tugged into a bitter smile as the thought invaded her mind. Her heart had been broken? It sounded like something Angela would say to her. Angela…well, speak of the devil.

"Honey…"

Her first reaction was to turn away but she knew her friend had already seen the tears that she had allowed to freely roll down her cheeks. "Um…I think I should go home and shower and get a change of clothes…I'm no use here, anyway. Booth's awake and…"

"Honey." Angela repeated herself more firmly this time and added a hand on Brennan's to make her point. "I'm so sorry…"

Brennan shook her head and looked at Angela with furrowed eyebrows. "Sorry? There's nothing to be sorry about. Booth's awake. He's fine."

"But he's not. He doesn't remember you."

"_Who are you?"_

The words rang in her ears and she had to dip her head to stop Angela from seeing the tears that had pooled in her eyes again.

Realizing she had just further opened her friend's wound, Angela made a sheepish face and sighed, "I'm sorry. I know this is hard." Brennan gave her another look. "It's supposed to be hard. I know how much he means to you…but I also know how much you mean to him. It's just a matter of time before he remembers you. The doctor said…"

Brennan nodded fervently as if the mention of 'doctor' somehow pulled her back into her logical, unemotional reality. "The doctor said the amnesia is common and usually subsides in a couple of months. I know. I knew that there had to be side effects to the surgery. I knew that short-term memory loss was a possibility. This doesn't surprise me."

Angela shook her head, not close to being convinced. "You're hurt and that's ok. It's ok to be hurt. The guy you like, the guy who probably wouldn't have even known he had been sick if you hadn't insisted he come in here for a check-up, the guy you held vigil beside for the last four days has finally awaken and he doesn't remember you. You're supposed to be hurt, sweetie. What you're not supposed to do is pretend like you're ok when you're not."

"There's no use in being hurt. It's not his fault. He's not purposely forgetting me…it's a side effect. It would be selfish for me to be hurt."

Sighing loudly, Angela threw her head back and resigned herself to the fact that Brennan would always be Brennan. "Can you just promise me that you won't retreat into that overly logical, no feelings allowed, everything has to make sense world of yours? I know that's what you wanna do but sometimes not everything is logical. Not everything has to make sense. Sometimes you need to let your feelings through. If there's anything….anyone who can help Booth remember you, it's you."

***

_You love someone, you open yourself up to suffering, that's the sad truth. Maybe they'll break your heart, maybe you'll break their heart and never be able to look at yourself in the same way. Those are the risks. That's the burden._


	2. Chapter 2

"…chemical reactions to the iodine would produce a substance known as…"

"Dr. Brennan?" Sweets knocked again and, this time, called out a little louder. "Dr. Brennan!"

Brennan looked up from the book she had immersed herself into and was surprised to find the lanky psychologist standing in her doorway. "Sweets, hi, I apologize, I was just reading this very interesting but very inaccurate article on…"

Sweets held his hand up to stop what he knew would be a ramble he would never be able to understand. "When I returned to the hospital to visit Agent Booth, I was surprised to find you were gone."

"Well Booth's awake and I can't do anything else for him so the logical thing to do was to come to work. With half the lab at the hospital visiting Booth, the last thing I should do is throw more work at those who are still here by being away as well."

"You speak as if you don't agree that people should be visiting Agent Booth."

"They care about him, I understand."

"Ok…now you're speaking as if you don't care about him."

"That isn't true. I just don't think that there is any use for me to be at the hospital. My presence will not make him any better than he already is. The doctor says he is stable and is well on his way to recovery."

"You know, usually, this is where I give you a whole speech about how I think you're using your logic as an excuse to forget about what you're really thinking or feeling inside but, I'm not going to this time because I think you already know what you're trying to hide. I think you know that coming back to the lab instead of staying at the hospital isn't what you really want. I think you know how important it would be for you to be there for Agent Booth right now instead of being here, reading a…" He pointed at the scientific journal Brennan still had clutched in her hands, "very interesting but very inaccurate article. What I will say, however, is that before I left the hospital, Agent Booth was asking for you."

"He was?" It was hard for her to hide the glimmer of hope in her voice.

"Well, not specifically by name but, he was asking a lot of questions about the 'lady who had been by his bedside when he woke up.'" Sweets pushed his hands into his pockets. "You've never struck me as one who gave up before even trying, Dr. Brennan. You never gave up on the hardest of cases and, yet, here you are, resigning yourself to the fact that Agent Booth has forgotten about you. Why is that?"

"I haven't resigned myself to anything. I'm perfectly aware that Booth will regain his memory sooner or later. Like I said, I just don't think that me being there will help him remember any quicker."

"Did you think that if you sat there for four days straight, it would help him wake up quicker?" Sweets smiled sympathetically when Brennan opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. "I think that you're afraid that even if he remembers you eventually, he may not remember the feelings he had for you. Which would've been just fine for the old Dr. Brennan, the one who didn't want babies and could've lived without a professional, or otherwise, partner. But the Dr. Brennan who sits in front of me now has grown to enjoy and may even be able to reciprocate the feelings you know Agent Booth had for you and it scares you to the core that there is a possibility that he may not remember those feelings."

"That's enough, Sweets." Brennan threw the journal in her hand onto the neat pile of other journals that had gathered on her desk. She got up from her chair and pulled down at her jacket to straighten it out. "I have work to do." Before Sweets could get another word in, she scurried out of her office and into the depths of her sanctuary – the lab.


	3. Chapter 3

"Hey, Dr. Brennan?"

"Yes, Wendell?" Brennan barely looked up from the steel table as one of the lab techs ascended the stairs to the examination podium.

"I was just on my way to the hospital to visit Agent Booth. I wanted to see if maybe you wanted to go together."

"No, I still have work to do."

If Wendell was taken aback by Brennan's abruptness, he did a good job of hiding it. He nodded and gave a polite wave goodbye, "Ok, then I'm out of here…unless you need help with anything?"

"No, it's alright. You go ahead."

"Ok, goodnight." As Wendell descended the podium stairs, he passed by Camille and offered her a smile, "Goodnight, Dr. Saroyan."

"Night, Wendell." Camille ascended the stairs and stood at the edge of the podium for a moment, watching Brennan work, until she couldn't stand in silence in any longer. "It's nearly midnight."

"Yes, it is." Brennan answered nonchalantly, her attention still focused on the pelvic bone she was examining.

"Ok, I'm just gonna come out and ask you, why aren't you at the hospital with Agent Booth?"

"I don't really understand what the big deal is. I'm not a neurosurgeon. I know a lot but the brain isn't my specialty. I would be of no help to Booth. And anyway, you said it was nearly midnight. He's probably sleeping."

"And yet, that hasn't stopped Wendell from going to the hospital to visit him. It also hasn't stopped Angela, Hodgins, and the rest of the team from going there as well. It definitely won't stop me either. So, again, why are you here and not there?" Camille crossed her arms as Brennan finally stopped fiddling with the pelvic bone and looked up at her.

"I will visit him when…I'm done here."

"That bone is part of a cold case. I don't recall asking you to reopen it. The only reason I've allowed you to examine and reexamine the bone all evening is because I know you needed something to distract you for the time being but, it's nearly midnight and you've poked and prodded that bone for a good five hours now. Unless you have something new to add to the previous evidence, I'm going to have to tell you to put the bone away and leave. If you don't wanna go to the hospital to visit Agent Booth, then go home and get some rest. You've had a long few days."

"I'm fine. I'm not tired."

"Ok, then go to the hospital."

"I…" Brennan knew she had run out of excuses. She snapped off her latex gloves and took off her protective glasses. "I think I will go home, then. Goodnight, Cam."


	4. Chapter 4

As Camille slid the glass door open, the various faces within the room all looked up, including the one they were all here to visit. "Hey, how are you doing?" She smiled ruefully at Booth.

He winced slightly as he smiled. Any movement of any muscle still seemed to invoke pain. The doctor had told him this was normal, as was his amnesia, but knowing their normality didn't make him feel any better about either. "Uh…better, I think." He watched as Angela quickly pulled Camille aside. Even through his heavily-bandaged head, he managed to hear the words, "Where is Brennan?" Brennan. Something told him that was the woman of the hour. "Brennan." Saying her name seemed to wake everyone up.

Angela's eyes widened along with her smile, "Yes, Brennan! You remember her!"

"Um…no, I just heard you…" He trailed off as everyone's faces told him that had been the wrong thing to say. "Ok, what's going on here? Everytime I ask you about the woman who was here when I woke up, I never get a straight answer from any of you. Now, I say her name and it's like I've said the magic word! What's going on? Ow…" He pushed back into his pillow and closed his eyes as a pang of pain shot down his spine. Ok, maybe frustration wasn't a good idea after major brain surgery.

"Whoa, whoa…buddy, take it easy there." Hodgins looked at the faces of his team and sighed as he turned back to the patient. "Dr. Temperance Brennan is our colleague and our friend. She's also someone you worked closely with…"

"Your partner, really." Nigel-Murray offered helpfully.

"My partner? So, she's FBI too?"

"No, she works at the lab with us but you two work very closely together on cases."

"And you were very good friends, off work." Camille added.

Angela threw her hands up tiredly, "Ok, let's stop beating around the bush, shall we? Booth, you and Brennan were like Bonnie and Clyde. You guys were a perfect team…perfect fit. You meant a lot to each other…and you're not even listening to me…"

Booth had, indeed, tuned out. Something Angela said had triggered a faint memory. He frowned slowly, hoping that would lessen the pain he knew was coming. "Bonnie and Clyde…" He muttered as he tried hard to bring the blurry picture in his mind into focus. "We're like Bonnie and Clyde…murderer and cheater…"

"What?" Hodgins frowned, looking skeptically at Booth and then looking up at the rest of them to see if anyone understood what the patient had just said.

Angela looked just as clueless. "Ok, should we be worried? He's not making any sense…"

"Booth, are you ok? Booth!" Camille placed gave Booth's shoulder a light squeeze.

He opened his eyes, the picture quickly dissipating from his mind. "She was my wife!"

"Um…no, you may have wanted that but…no." Angela shook her head. "Your relationship with Brennan, as far as any of us knew, was strictly platonic. At the very least, I'm sure you weren't married."

"But…"

"Maybe we should get his doctor in here…"

"No! Damn!" Booth held back more cursing as pain enveloped his head this time.

"Ok…no…doctor…" Angela proceeded carefully, not wanting to provoke Booth any further. "Maybe you should get some rest."

"Yes, that's a good idea. We'll come back to visit you tomorrow." Camille ushered her team out of the room and gave Booth one last reassuring squeeze of his hand before exiting herself.

Booth mustered a tired wave as his friends disappeared around the corner. He let his body relax into his bed as his mind began to pull the shattered picture back into one piece. Bonnie and Clyde. He could see it again…she was there beside him as he drove. Somebody had called. They had answered the phone together. They had laughed. They were happy. His eyes closed and he slowly drifted to sleep with the smallest of smiles left on his face.


	5. Chapter 5

She had been unable to sleep. To her chagrin, everytime she closed her eyes, all she could see was Booth's face and his words, "Who are you?" She unwittingly clenched her fists as she remembered the words. It wasn't until she was in the safety of her own mind that she could admit to her frustration. How could he not remember her? After everything they had been through…how could he not remember her?

Every ounce of her body told her to stay away, that nothing good would come out of seeing him but she couldn't help herself. Maybe by speaking to him, she would be able to figure out why she was the only one he seemed to have forgotten. She knew, however, that this wasn't the reason why she was here at two in morning. No, she was here, simply, because she wanted to see him.

The glass door slid open quietly and she stepped into the room without making a sound. She could hear by the depth of his breathing that he was fast asleep. Good. She wasn't sure what to say to him. What do you say to someone who doesn't remember you? She fought off the urge to touch his face, not wanting to risk waking him up. He looked so peaceful, a far cry from the confusion and daze she had found on his face when he had awakened to find her at his bedside. The memory of that moment pulled at her heart again and she stepped back slightly. She immediately regretted it when her foot hit one of the monitors that had been behind her.

"Hmm…?" Booth began to stir.

"I, uh…" Brennan cursed at herself silently. How could she have been so clumsy? "I'm sorry," She said softly as he opened his eyes, "I didn't mean to wake you up."

"That's ok." He smiled groggily. "I've been sleeping a whole lot, anyway."

"That's good. Patients who have just gone through major brain surgery are supposed to get a lot of rest. You had reacted badly to the anesthesia so, your body needs even more rest to recover. You should really go back to sleep. I'll just…" She pointed to the door, hoping that would be enough to allow her to escape.

"No, no…I'm not sleepy. You should stay." He insisted.

For a moment, she thought her hands had clenched into fists again. It wasn't until she looked down that she realized Booth's hand was around hers.

"Sorry…" Booth quickly let go and let his fingers wiggle awkwardly.

"How…is your head feeling?"

"Hurts. The drugs help." He grinned. "A lot."

She nodded. "Yes, they're supposed to."

"Right…um…you're a doctor, right?"

The question was a stark reminder of why they were both here. Brennan nodded as stoically as possible. "Yes, but I'm not a surgeon or a specialist in neurology so, if you're in any pain or need any help with…"

Booth chuckled. "Are you always this cold?"

Brennan bristled at the suggestion. "I'm not cold."

"No, you're just like Iceland."

"Excuse me?"

He paused and frowned. Where did that come from? Iceland? "I…don't know. Does that mean anything to you? Iceland?"

"Iceland's a country in the northern hemisphere but other than that…"

What was it about Iceland that he had connected with this brilliantly amusing creature in front of him? He stared at her for what seemed like an eternity before he remembered it. Bonnie and Clyde. Iceland. "Cold on the outside but all volcano on the inside!" That seemed to only confuse her even further. He grinned. "Iceland! It's cold on the outside but full of volcanoes on the inside! That's you!"

Brennan was shocked. Here was a man who professed not to remember her and yet, here he was, making up country-based metaphors to describe her. She wasn't sure if she should be insulted or flattered. "I hardly think that I'm like Iceland."

"So, are you saying you're not cold on the outside or are you not all volcano on the inside?"

"You don't even know me!"

"Correction, I don't remember you…but, I'm beginning to." He wagged a proud finger at her.

He was starting to remember her? For a moment, she felt an uncontrollable feeling of glee but she quickly suppressed it, keeping her cool demeanor on display. "You've never used that to describe me before." She said skeptically.

"What? Iceland?" He shrugged, "Well, they keep telling me we weren't married but…"

"Married?"

"Yeah, you and me. Married. Hey, did you ever cheat on me?"

This was bizarre. Nothing about this conversation made sense to her. Brennan sighed and shook her head. "Maybe I should get the doctor to come take a look at you…"

"Why does everyone treat me like I'm crazy? I swear, you and I were married! Look, I don't remember the details but the important thing is, I'm beginning to remember, right?"

"Wrong, Booth, not if what you're remembering isn't the truth."

"So, we weren't married?" He seemed genuinely disappointed.

"No, we weren't."

"Right…our relationship was strictly platonic?"

She paused ever so slightly before answering with a firm, "Yes."

He looked at her as if trying to gauge whether she was being honest or not. Finally, he nodded apologetically, "Right, I'm sorry about that…I just…maybe it was just a dream or something…I dunno…"

"You were having hallucinations before the surgery. Maybe this was just another one of them. You should let your doctor know."

"Right, right…" He nodded, looking at her again. He could tell even behind the concrete expression, there was something worth asking about but he couldn't put his finger on it.

"I should go now. It's late. You should get some rest and I have to go back to the lab later."

"Oh wait…um…you'll come visit me tomorrow, right?"

"You mean today."

"What?"

She stopped in the doorway, "Today. It's two right now. So, when you say 'tomorrow', you actually mean 'today'."

He couldn't help but laugh. Thankfully, the drugs the nurse had given him were able to hold off the pain that was inevitably occurring as he laughed. "Right, today. You'll come visit me today, right?"

"I…will see…as soon as my work is done at the lab. Goodnight." And with that, she was gone.


	6. Chapter 6

Angela arrived at the lab at seven sharp. It didn't surprise her at all that the light in Brennan's office was already on. It was there that she found her friend staring intently at her computer screen. She knocked on the door and opened it when she got a faint sound of permission. "Well, good morning to you."

"Good morning." Brennan made a few clicks of her mouse and looked up.

"You're here early." Angela made her way to the desk and looked down at her friend with worry, "Did you even get any sleep?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I managed a good three hours."

"You've barely slept for four days. Three hours is not good."

"It's sufficient and it's been proven that you can't make up for lost sleep. Even if I had slept for ten hours last night, it would not have made up for my lack of sleep for the last four days."

"Booth's been asking about you."

"I know. Sweets told me."

Angela waited for more but when she didn't get any, she asked, "Are you going to visit him today?"

"Actually, I already did yesterday."

"You did? That's great! I didn't think you were going to but, that's great! Did you guys manage to talk?"

"Yes, I asked him how he was feeling and he said he was better."

"That's it?" Angela asked with a little annoyance.

"We…may have also talked about…some things…he may have mentioned something about us being married." Brennan quickly brushed it off, "It was probably just another hallucination or a dream induced by the anesthesia. I told him to let his doctor know."

"You don't see it, do you?"

"See what?"

"Honey, sit down, please." Angela pulled a hesitant Brennan down onto the couch near the door. "Hallucination, dream, whatever it was…don't you think that it's meaningful that the subject of it was you?"

Brennan shook her head without a thought, "No. Dreams and hallucinations can be very random. I was the last person he saw before his surgery. That I would be part of his dream isn't surprising or meaningful at all."

"So you don't think that it's Freudian at all that while he was in a coma, he dreamt about being married to you and something about being like Bonnie and Clyde…"

"Angela, I don't think Sigmund Freud really appreciates everyone throwing his name out there everytime someone has a random dream. There is nothing worth learning about here."

"And you're in denial! If this isn't Booth's subconscious at work, I don't know what is!" When Brennan offered no response, Angela continued, "He dreamt about being married to you because that is what he wants, subconsciously. He wants to be with you. That is beyond meaningful!" Still, Brennan stayed silent. "Sweetie, seriously, what are you so afraid of? Don't you love him?"

"I…" Brennan breathed out and shrugged, "It doesn't matter. He doesn't remember me."

"For now. He will…but the more distance you put between you two while he's trying to remember, the less quickly he will. If you really want him to remember you, you need to be there to remind him of who you are…of who you both were. He needs you."


	7. Chapter 7

"Knock, knock."

Booth opened his eyes to find his favourite psychologist standing in the doorway. "Hey, Sweets! Come on in!"

Sweets entered the room and pointed towards the general vicinity of Booth's head, "How's it going?"

"Well, they're trying to slowly wean me off the meds so, I can barely watch an hour of daytime soaps without getting a headache right now."

Sweets chuckled, "I haven't gone through brain surgery and I can barely watch an hour of soaps without getting a headache, I wouldn't worry about it."

"So, what brings you here, Sweets?"

"Just wanted to see how you were doing…"

"Really? Nothing else you wanna ask about?"

"Is there anything you wanna talk to me about?"

"Oh, come on, Sweets, everyone who's come to visit me these past few days have all come in here pretending to be worried when, really, they're just worried that I'll somehow never remember this non-relationship I had with Dr. Brennan…which, by the way, I still don't understand why it seems to be everyone's business!"

"Wait…first of all, everyone who comes to visit you, at least, those from the lab, are all here on truthful intentions. They really do care."

"I know, I know…" Booth looked away like a child who had just been caught lying.

"But the way you just reacted shows me that you're frustrated with this memory loss of yours."

"How could I not be? You should've seen her…she looked devastated."

"Who? You mean Dr. Brennan?"

Booth nodded. "She was here a few days ago. Everyone else had left. I could tell she's really hurt that I don't remember her."

"Understandable. You two were…"

"A perfect team. Perfect fit. I know."

"I was going to say, 'quite a pair', but you get the idea."

"It's not that I don't want to remember her. I do! I want to remember her! Especially since everyone seems to think that we had some amazing, irreplaceable rapport but…I just can't. It's like she's been completely erased from my memory!"

"But she hasn't been. I heard you had some sort of dream while you were in your coma."

"Yeah, but it was just a dream." Booth shook his head, remembering how abruptly Brennan had corrected what he thought had been a memory. "It was nothing."

"On the contrary, dreams can be very insightful. Though not entirely a memory, a dream can tell you plenty about someone's inner thoughts."

"Don't do your psycho babble on me right now, Sweets, I'm not in the mood."

"Fine, but I'm telling you, your dream wasn't nothing. It meant something. Maybe if you examined it a little closer, it could provide you with some path to the memories you so want to find."

Booth paused, mulling over what Sweets had just suggested. "So…what? Do you…wanna like, hypnotize me or something?"

"No, though hypnotherapy can be useful for amnesia patients, your case is a bit different because your amnesia was caused, not by the surgery itself, but by your reaction to the anesthesia."

"Right…but, my memory should still be somewhere in my brain, right?"

"Yes, and if my first method doesn't work, we could always try hypnotherapy. I imagine you wouldn't be a very easy hypnotherapy patient though. It requires a high level of belief in the actual method."

"Ok, so…what then?"

"Let's start by telling me about your dream."

"Oh, come on…do I have to?"

"Yes, yes you do! If you want to regain your memory, then yes, you need to tell me about your dream! Now, start from the beginning. You and Brennan are married, right?"


	8. Chapter 8

Brennan had been busying herself with some random tasks around the lab. She could've easily asked one of the techs to handle all the errands but she had needed something to distract her. All she could think about was…

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the elevator chime. Usually, she would find the untimely, 'ding!' rather annoying but today, everytime it chimed, she would look up hopefully. For most of the day, she had been disappointed each time but this time was different. This time, when the doors opened, she smiled. She quickly gestured towards her office and practically sprinted there, arriving at the door just moments before the Sweets, who had just vacated the elevator.

Once they were in the sound-proofed safety of her office, she asked anxiously, "Did he tell you?"

"Have I ever disappointed you, Dr. Brennan?" Sweets smiled rather arrogantly.

"Actually, there was the time…"

Sweets held his hand up to stop her and shook his head, "That was rhetorical and, usually, when someone helps you, you try not to remind them of when they disappointed you."

"So, he told you?"

"I have to start by saying, I was very surprised when you came to me for help. I know you've never truly believed in my skills…"

"I believe in your skills. I just don't believe in psychology." Brennan offered off-handedly.

"Right…" Sweets composed himself and continued, "Nevertheless, I was surprised when you came to me and asked me to find out what Booth's dream was. You could've easily asked him yourself and yet, you chose not to because you were afraid you would come to the same conclusion as Angela did. I do, however, have to ask then, aren't you afraid I would come to the same conclusion as well?"

"And did you?"

"You mean, do I agree with Angela that Booth's dream was meaningful in that it provided great insight into his subconscious feelings? Yes, then, I agree wholeheartedly with Angela. Booth dreamed that the two of you were a married couple who owned some sort of nightclub with the rest of the team as your staff. There was some substory about a murder or something but the main point is that he dreamed you two were a couple. A happy couple. A happy couple that, may I add, were expecting their first baby."

"I was pregnant in his dream?" Brennan seemed shocked. "He didn't mention that last time I spoke to him…"

"He says he only began to remember the details these past few days, during which, he told me, you haven't been to visit him once."

"I've been busy here."

"Dr. Brennan, there have been no big cases these past few days. I know you've only been busying yourself with mundane tasks that could easily be done by any of the technicians." When Brennan offered no response, he continued, "I think his dream was very meaningful. It means a lot that he would dream of the two of you as a couple on the path to creating a family together. It says plenty of his feelings for you. If I was only speculating before, this is proof."

"It was just a dream…"

"You sound even less convinced than you sounded when you first asked me to find out what the dream was. You know this means something."

It was a moment before she answered, "So what? He remembers the dream me but he can't remember the real me. I don't see how any of this matters."

"The only way he's ever going to remember you is if you actually spend time with him. Staying in the lab, getting me to find out about his dream…you're not gonna get him to remember you anytime soon this way."

"Angela thinks I should spend more time with him too."

"So why don't you? You're a woman of logic, Dr. Brennan. You know as well as I do that in cases like Agent Booth's, amnesia patients need to spend time with the people who used to matter to them for them to remember what they've lost. They need to reconnect. If you don't even allow him that chance, how will he ever remember you?"


	9. Chapter 9

It had been a week since she had visited Booth that night he told her about the dream. As Angela and Sweets had so accurately stated, she had avoided visiting Booth because she was afraid and now that she was alone with her thoughts, she could admit to it. She stared out into the starlit sky and wondered if the other things they had said were also correct. Was Booth's dream really a summary of his subconscious feelings for her? Did he really want a family with her? And, probably more important, did she want that too?

Before she could answer her own question, her cell phone vibrated, making it skid across her smooth bedside table. "Hello?" She picked it up before it had a chance to fall off the edge onto the floor.

It was the hospital. "Hi, is this Dr. Brennan? I'm a nurse at the Sibley Memorial Hospital. We have a patient here, his name is Seeley Booth?"

"Yes, is everything alright with him? Did something happen?"

"No, everything's alright, Dr. Brennan. Mr. Booth asked me to call you. He wanted to see you. I insisted the last thing a brain surgery patient needed was more visitors but he was very persistent."

Something in the nurse's voice told Brennan Booth's persistence, perhaps, was not appreciated. She allowed herself a smile as she replied, "I'll be right there. Thank you for calling me."

***

"Brennan!" Booth nearly jumped out of his bed when Brennan arrived.

She offered him a polite smile. "Is everything ok? The nurse only said that you wanted to see me."

"Yeah, and um…I'm glad you're here. I know it's late. I hope she didn't wake you."

"No, I wasn't asleep yet."

"Good, good…so…um…it's been a while…"

"A week, yes, I apologize for not coming sooner. Things have been a little hectic at the lab lately." Before she could catch herself, the lie slipped off her tongue. She wondered if the other lab staff members had told him otherwise but it was too late to take it back now.

If Booth knew she was lying, he showed no indication of it. "Oh, right, of course…it's ok. You're here now." He smiled boyishly.

"Was there something you wished to speak to me about?"

"Yeah, actually, I spoke with Sweets."

"Oh." A million thoughts flew through her mind. This was not something she was ready to discuss.

"He told me…" Booth proceeded carefully, hoping Brennan would be a little more talkative than she was being right now. "About you asking him to ask me about my dream?"

"He did?" Brennan swallowed hard, wondering why it suddenly seemed so hot in the room. This was not normal. She could feel her face flushing. What was happening?

Obviously noting her sudden change in demeanor, Booth held his hand up reassuringly, "It's fine…it's…I just…it's fine. I mean, you could've just asked me yourself but…it's fine. Are you ok?"

Brennan tried hard to pull herself together. "Yes, I'm fine. I just didn't realize Sweets would tell you something I thought was said in confidence."

"I hope I didn't just get the guy in trouble, I mean, it's not a big deal."

"But to Sweets it is. He's always doing things like this. He thinks that if he forces an issue, we'll somehow work things out and everything will be like a fairytale but it doesn't always work out that way." Brennan stopped short, a little horrified that she had allowed herself this outburst. She shook her head, "But you know that because you remember how he was."

_But you don't remember how I was_. Booth could hear the unspoken words. He felt a dagger of guilt stab him in the heart. "I asked you here because I want you to help me."

"Help you?"

"Yes, Sweets told me that he thinks the best way to remember you is to speak to you."

"Actually, I'm sure there are better ways to help you regain your memory. Hypnotherapy, for one, is known to help…"

"Brennan, please."

Hearing him call her by her last name was disconcerting. She remembered when there was a time when it would annoy her to no end when he would refer to her as 'Bones' and yet, now, she found herself longing to hear the word.

"I need you."

She looked at him and even though she knew he couldn't remember anything about the way he used to need her, she knew he genuinely needed her now. She nodded, "Ok, I'll help you."


	10. Chapter 10

The clock on the wall said it was half past six. Booth had known it was morning when he had noticed the sun peeking out in the horizon but he had no idea how long he and Brennan had been talking for until he had looked at the clock. He glanced over at the half-finished cup of coffee Brennan had gone to get earlier. Was it an hour ago? Maybe it was two hours ago. He wasn't sure. All he knew was that he was having a ball talking to this woman. He understood why everyone seemed so anxious for him to remember her. There was definitely something between them worth remembering.

Having caught Booth glance at the clock on the wall, Brennan misinterpreted it as a sign for her to leave. She got up from her rather uncomfortable chair and groaned softly as her back confirmed just how uncomfortable the chair had been. "I should get going…"

"Oh…do you have to?"

Was that actual longing in his eyes? She could never tell. She was never very good at reading people's facial expressions. Sweets had been training her recently but she was too tired to remember anything she had learned. "I need to go back to the lab."

"Right, of course, you need to work." He nodded, feeling a little stupid for asking in the first place. "T-Thanks for staying with me all night and talking to me."

She wanted to say that she hoped it had helped but she could tell by the way he looked at her that nothing had changed. He still couldn't remember her. She could feel the sinking feeling in her stomach grow stronger. It had been that way since he had awakened. Was this disappointment? "I should get going." She repeated, as if he had not heard the first time.

He nodded again. "Yeah, ok, I'll see you soon, then?"

A small smile and a nod later, she was gone.

He was alone again with nothing but his thoughts to accompany him. He wished there was more. He wished he had his memories too. His memories of her. Why couldn't he remember her? He felt a flood of frustration invade his body and he fell back into his pillow. For the first time since waking up, he considered the possibility of never remembering who Brennan was.

***

Brennan had been so distracted by her thoughts, she had not heard the calls of her name nor did she hear the tip-tapping of the heels chasing after her. It wasn't until Angela grabbed her arm that she realized someone was behind her. "Oh, hi." She answered rather absentmindedly.

Angela frowned, trying to catch her breath. "Are you ok? It's seven. You're late."

"The lab's workday begins at seven. I'm actually on time."

"I know, I meant…you're late according to your usual schedule. You're always here before seven."

Too exhausted to lie, Brennan pushed the door to her office open and sighed, "I was at the hospital."

"Visiting Booth?" When she got no answer, Angela continued, "What happened? You look upset."

"He doesn't remember me, of course I'm upset." It had been the first time she had said the words out loud. It surprised her to know how easily the words had flowed out.

Angela nodded and watched as her friend fidgeted with the various papers and pens on her desk. "It's only been like a week. This stuff takes time."

"I talked with him the entire night. I told him about previous cases we had worked together on. I told him about everything I could think of. Every minute detail. In the end, he didn't remember me anymore than he had before I had talked to him." She shrugged and her voice grew quiet as she added the last part, "Maybe he'll never remember me…"

"No, you don't believe that. You can't believe that."

"Why not? Yes, most amnesia patients regain their memory within a couple of months but there have been cases where some people never regain their memory. It's just a part of reality. Not everything works out the way they should."

"Booth's going to remember you."

"How can you be so sure? I'm not one to use fate as an excuse for life's twists and turns but I think this happened for a reason. Maybe Booth forgot about me for a reason."

"Ok, let's just say this crazy idea of yours is true. Then what is that reason? Why would he forget about you?" Angela took a seat across from Brennan at her desk.

"You know how before all of this happened, I had wanted a baby? I had asked Booth to be the father of my child."

"Yes, and he had gone to the sperm bank to make a donation…"

"Right, but he had come to me after to tell me he couldn't."

"So he didn't do it?"

"No, he said something about a cartoon telling him he shouldn't do it."

"A cartoon?"

"It was one of his hallucinations."

"Ok, so?"

"So…maybe this is the reason why he forgot about me. The cartoon was a hallucination. It was, as you and Sweets seem to think, a part of his subconscious, like his coma-induced dream had been. His subconscious was telling him not to father my child."

"And you think his amnesia is also his subconscious telling him not to father your child?"

"It's a bit extreme but, yes. Maybe this is just another way for his subconscious to tell him that having any personal association with me is…wrong."

"Oh my god, sweetie, you can't honestly believe that's true."

"Well, why not? I mean…he hallucinated a cartoon baby that told him not to father my child. I think anything's possible."

"That's just the hurt and frustration talking. You know as well as I do that Booth wants to be associated with you, whether it be professionally or personally. I'm sure there's more to it than just a cartoon baby telling him not to do it. Don't let any of this get you down, ok? I know it's hard. I know you want him to remember you. We all want that but, it's going to take time. You need to have faith."

"Faith is…"

"Not logical. Blind. Yes. But if there's any time for you to believe in it and to have it, it's now."


	11. Chapter 11

Brennan had struggled with the decision for several hours. She had been contemplating turning around even up until she had gotten into the elevator. Now that she was at the glass door of his room, she knew she had to move forward. Booth was channel surfing when she opened the door and entered. He quickly turned off the TV and looked at her eagerly. She offered him a smile, "Hi."

He smiled back, "Hi." He had been sure she wouldn't be back, at least, not so soon. After their less than productive all-nighter, he was sure she wouldn't want to speak to him again. Yet, here she was. "You just missed Cam and Angela. They just left."

"Yes, they told me they would be coming after work. How are you feeling?" She felt stupid asking him. She knew he would still be feeling pain, probably more than he originally was feeling right after the operation because they were slowly lessening his pain medication now. She asked, anyway. Sweets had taught her that sometimes what seemed mundane to her was actually profound to others in social settings like this.

"Good, considering they haven't given me much meds since this morning."

"It'll take some time for the pain to fully go away but they have to slowly wean you off the medication because many people have been known to get addicted to them."

He smiled again, this time at her seemingly endless need to make everything sound logical. It had only been a week since he had gotten to know this woman and, already, he was getting used to her quirks. "That's what the doctor says. So…to be honest, I didn't really expect to see you here again so soon. I mean…our conversation last night was really fun but…"

"It wasn't very helpful, I know." She finished his thought for him. It was something she had grown to do and yet, this time, it felt so different. "I'm actually here to talk to you about that."

"Look, before you say anything, lemme just say this…I know this is tough for you. I know that me not remembering you…it hurts, and I wish I could change that, believe me. I really wanna remember you and I will do everything in my power to do this. I will remember you. And I know it's a lot to ask for but I just hope that you could stick this one out. Everything you told me last night about how we used to be…it sounds like we would've done anything for each other and I hope that's still true. I know I will remember you. I just…I need you to stay with me."

Brennan hadn't expected this. Throughout the day, she had repeated what she was planning to say to Booth over and over again in her head. She had even planned how she would respond to his possible responses but this was not something she had considered.

"Brennan, say something, say anything." Booth pleaded, leaning towards her anxiously for a response. He ignored the pain that was shooting down his spine as he shifted his position to be closer to her.

"Since we're being honest with each other, I should tell you that I had come in here wanting to tell you that as hard as this has been, I was willing to help you as long as you were willing to remember. Actually, I was very disappointed when I had left you this morning…" She watched as Booth nodded understandingly, "I am a bit ashamed to say this but I was ready to give up." The hopeful look on Booth's face was immediately replaced with one of fear. "But, Angela talked me out of it. She said that I should have faith and I'm not saying that I now suddenly believe in the concept of faith but…" She wasn't sure how to finish.

"But you believe in me." Booth grinned. Before she could reply, he added, "I'm not going to disappoint you, Brennan. I'm not gonna let you down."


	12. Chapter 12

"Ok…"

"Agent Booth…"

"We're gonna…"

"Go then…"

All the lab techs were speaking at once but they were all saying the same thing so that as Booth caught a part of each of their sentences, it all made sense. He waved from his spot on his couch, "Thanks, guys!"

Brennan followed the crew to the door where Angela hesitated. Sensing there was something her friend wanted to say, Brennan waited until the rest of the group was far enough outside in the hallway before she asked softly, "Is something wrong?"

"No, actually, everything's great. You and Booth, I mean. You guys, dare I say, look like you're back to where you were before, at least, you're getting there." Angela smiled and gave Brennan a proud pat on her arm.

"Well, we've been spending a lot of time together. I've been telling him a lot about old cases and memories I have that I can share. It's really all I can do."

"That's good. I can tell you're really helping."

"I don't think he remembers me yet."

"I meant with his general healing. You heard his doctor earlier. Booth's healed a lot faster than expected. For goodness sake, he's home now! I don't think it's a coincidence that he's healed so quickly while you were spending time with him."

"Angela! You coming or what?" Hodgins voice echoed around the corner down the hallway.

"Alright!" Angela yelled back before giving Brennan a quick hug, "Give us a call if you or Booth need anything, ok? Stay strong, sweetie, it's just a matter of time."

Brennan gave her friend an unconvincing smile before closing the door and returning to the living room where Booth had now turned on the TV. "It's late. You should really go to bed."

"Oh, come on, Bones," After hearing from Brennan that he had used to call her by that nickname, he had begun to use it often, hoping it would trigger some memories, "It isn't even midnight yet! I haven't been home in over a month. Gimme a break." He shot her his best puppy dog look.

She sighed, partly too tired to argue and partly knowing she wouldn't be able to fight that look, "Alright, but only until midnight. Then it's TV off and you in bed."

"You're the boss." He shrugged with a triumphant smile. He began flipping through the various channels, hoping to find something interesting for the both of them to watch. He knew there was slim chance of that happening, though, not only because they had such different tastes in entertainment but, also, because late-night television didn't offer much variety. He wasn't sure how long he had been searching through the channels but when he finally landed on a boring-looking documentary on 18th-century architecture, he realized there was a head on his shoulder. He glanced over to find Brennan fast asleep against his body. He smiled and slowly relaxed his own body against the couch. It wasn't long before he, too, had drifted to sleep.

It was still dark outside when Brennan awoke. She looked at a nearby clock and was shocked to see that it was four already. "Booth!" She bolted up from the couch and softly nudged what had been her pillow for the last four hours, "Booth! Wake up!"

Booth muttered incoherently, unwilling to awake. It wasn't until Brennan gave him a harder nudge that he finally stirred. "What is it? Ow!" He began flailing his arm around, trying to get rid of the feeling of pins and needles.

"What happened? Are you in pain? Is it your head?" Brennan asked in an unusually panicked voice.

"No, no…it's not my head. It's my arm. It's asleep." His grimace was quickly replaced with a small smile. "Thanks to you."

"I'm sorry, I must've dozed off. Why didn't you wake me up? You were supposed to take your antibiotics before you slept." Before he could stop her, she was already in the kitchen pouring him a glass of water. "You have to remember to take your antibiotics. You cannot risk getting an infection. Here." She emerged from the kitchen with a glass of water in one hand and two white pills in the other.

"Calm down, Bones, it's fine. I'm used to sleeping at odd hours. As long as I take these once a day, I'm fine. I listened to the doctor too, ya know?" He grinned up at her before swallowing the pills with one gulp of water.

"You should go to bed now."

"No, it's fine, why don't you take my bed and I'll sleep here."

"You just had major brain surgery a month ago, Booth, you can't sleep on the couch. I'll be fine out here."

"I wouldn't be able to sleep well knowing you were sleeping on the couch. What kinda man would I be if I let you sleep out here when you're here taking care of me?"

"Booth, can you please stop arguing with me and just go to bed?"

"Ok, how about this? We both sleep in the bed."

Brennan was at a lost for words. Did Booth just say what she thought he said?

"Now, don't go getting the wrong idea. My intentions are pure. When I hurt my back, I slept out here and I can tell you it's not comfortable. My bed is big enough for the both of us. If it makes you feel better, we could even do the whole pillow line in the middle to keep wandering hands away."

"No, that will be fine."

"Bones…"

"I meant, we won't need to do the pillow line. I trust that your hands won't wander."

Booth's lips tugged up into a devilish smile but he restrained himself from making a joke. "Good, then it's settled." He slung his arm over Brennan's shoulders and led her towards his bedroom.


	13. Chapter 13

Booth had woken up at the crack of dawn. The pain he had felt so strongly while in the hospital had subsided a lot by now but, now and then, he would get a strong shock down his spine. According to the doctor, this was perfectly normal and he would probably feel shocks for, at least, a couple more months. This morning, a shock had waken him up and he had been unable to fall back asleep. He was perfectly fine with this because he had found something better to do than sleeping. All he had to do was turn to his other side and there she was. Fast asleep. So peaceful. He smiled to himself. It was then that something odd happened. It was like someone had taken a photo but instead of being blinded by the flash, it occurred inside his mind. Like a cliché in a movie, he saw a bright flash of light and then…

"Booth?"

Her voice pulled him out of his reverie. She was awake. "Good morning." He smiled drunkenly.

She looked worried, though. Her hand was on his arm and she was propped up on her forearm. "Are you ok? You were out of it for a while."

A while? How long had he been daydreaming? It took a minute for him to find the right words. "Bones, I think I remember something…"

"You remember something?" She sat up abruptly. She had waited for those words for so long, now that she finally heard him say them, she wasn't sure how to react.

"I'm not sure…it's kinda blurry but…I was just lying here and then something happened…it was like a flash." He knew he wasn't make any sense. He could tell by the way she was looking at him. "I don't know how to explain it…"

She could hear the frustration in his voice. She didn't want to push him but she also knew if she didn't push it now, he may lose any glimmer of hope so she trekked forward. "Ok, tell me slowly what you saw."

"We were couple…we were living together…in a really small space…" He shut his eyes and controlled his urge to bang his head with his hands. This was infuriating. These were memories locked inside his head and he didn't have the key to them! There was nothing more he could offer. He opened his eyes dejectedly and hesitated to look at Brennan, afraid to see the disappointment he knew would be in her eyes. "I'm sorry."

Instead of disappointment, however, what he found was a smile. She looked wide awake now. "This small space…was it a trailer?"

Why did it matter? Booth frowned, trying hard to search his mind for the right answer. "It was small…"

"Booth, I know this is hard but you need to try to remember. What was the small space like?"

He looked at her. He could tell this was very important to her. He knew he had to try so he squeezed his eyes tight and tried to pull the pieces together. Small space. Together. Clowns? A circus? "Buck and Wanda Moosejaw!" His eyes flew open as the words flew out of his mouth. He had no idea what those names meant but, immediately, he knew they meant something to Brennan.

"You remembered!" She flung her arms around him, pulling him into a hug, a rare showing of emotions on her part. Quickly, she recovered and let him go but the excitement stayed on her face. "Those are the names we used for a case we were on. We had to go undercover in a circus."

Wait, he remembered something else. "You told me about that case." She had been telling him about all their previous cases during this past month. He was sure she had told him about this one. The hope he had felt just a mere second ago seemed to drain out of him. Was he only remembering something she had told him?

"Yes, I did, but I'm sure I never told you our names. I only told you what was relevant to the case. I never told you our names!" She was still grinning.

This buoyed his emotions again. Did he really remember that on his own? "I remembered the names…"

"This is good, Booth, this is really, really good." Before she could begin enjoying this small tinge of hope, she remembered that this was only a baby step in the long path he had to take. Two names from a recent case were nothing compared to the rest of the memories they still shared and he still forgot.

"You're not happy." He read the change in expressions on her face correctly.

She hated when he did that. He was always so good at reading her. "No, I am. I'm really happy for you."

"But you don't think it's enough. I know. It's not enough." He shook his head, reading her mind yet again. "There's still a lot I need to remember."

"Yes, you do."

"But this is a good sign, right? It means I'm starting to open up to remembering…"

"Yes, it's usually the first step that's the hardest. Once your brain begins to find lost memories, it should be easier and smoother now."

"That's good." He nodded, wondering if he was doing a good job of convincing her because he knew he was barely convincing himself.

And just like that, their hopeful moment had ended. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and began shuffling to the door. "I'll cook some breakfast while you wash up."

"Bones." He called out to her.

She stopped with one foot out the door and turned to face him, "Yes, Booth?"

"I know it seems like it's been a series of nothing but disappointments but I'm sure we can do this."

"I know." She said with no clear emotions in her voice. With that, she turned and proceeded out the room.


	14. Chapter 14

"Dr. Brennan!" Hodgins trotted down the stairs of the examination podium and followed Brennan to her office. "How's everything with Agent Booth?"

Brennan nodded, shedding her jacket, "Fine. He promised me he would stay put on his couch all day until I go back after work."

While she was speaking, Camille joined Hodgins at the door. "You're here. I thought you were going to take a few days off to take care of Agent Booth."

Frowning, Brennan tried to remember when she had discussed this with Camille. She hadn't. "I never said that…"

Camille nodded. "I know, I just assumed…"

"I won't need days off. I'll come into the lab as I usually do and go to Booth's after work."

"I don't wanna seem like a worry wart but are we talking about the same Seeley Booth? He's probably jumping around in his underwear, playing the air guitar…" Camille stopped herself short when she remembered who she was speaking to. Pop culture references were not Brennan's strong suit. "Do you really think it's safe to leave a brain surgery patient alone at home all day?"

"I considered that but I don't think I'll be anymore helpful if I stay there all day. I'm much more helpful here."

"You know, there really aren't that many cases. In fact, I don't even know why I'm here…" Hodgins gave Camille a look to let her know he was kidding before he continued, "We'll be fine without you for a couple of days, Dr. Brennan."

"Really, I don't think…" Before she could continue, she watched as Camille waved to someone outside her door. She looked up to see Angela walking towards them.

"Hey, what's going on? Why are you here and not with Booth?" Angela repeated the same questions everyone else had asked before her.

Brennan saw the looks on the faces of Hodgins and Camille as if they were saying, "I told you so." She sighed, letting her shoulders sag. Without another word, she sat down, propping her head on her hand.

Taking this as their signal to leave, Camille and Hodgins gave Brennan one last look of support before exiting. Angela stayed behind and joined her friend at her desk. "What's going on? When we left you last night, the two of you were doing great."

"He remembered something this morning."

Angela's initial reaction was the same as the one Brennan had earlier in the morning. "That's great! It's great!" She paused, "It's great, isn't it?"

"Of course it is…"

"But…"

"He remembered two names. The names we used when we went undercover in that circus."

"Right…ok, so, what's wrong? He's starting to remember! Isn't that what you want?"

"But it's just two names. He has so much more to remember."

"It'll happen."

"But when? I know it's very selfish of me to think this way. I know the right thing for me to do is to be happy for him. I should be happy that he's beginning to remember but I can't. I know this is going to be a long and hard road and there's always a possibility that he won't regain all his memories. That is reality. I can't just not think of that."

"Ok…and that's ok. Reality is your friend. Everyone knows that."

"That's the problem. This morning, when he remembered the names, he was so happy but then he saw that I wasn't happy." She looked down at her hands. "He could always tell when I wasn't happy."

"And you feel bad for ruining his moment?"

"He shouldn't have to feel guilty everytime he remembers something. He should be happy. He shouldn't feel guilty for not remembering enough but…I'm afraid that is what I'm making him feel."

"Honey, with or without you there, the man's going to feel guilty. It's just a part of human nature."

"But I'm a constant reminder of what he forgot without actually remembering anything. I don't think that's fair to him."

"What are you saying, Brennan?"

She looked up at Angela. It wasn't that she was at a loss for words. She just didn't want to say it. "Maybe it was wrong of me to promise him I would help him."

"Don't give up now. You've gotten so far."

"What if I'm holding him back?"

"Are you serious? You're the reason why he recovered so quickly. You were there when he remembered something this morning. You're the reason he's moving forward. You can't just leave him behind now. Sweetie, this is just another one of those frustration phases. You need to focus on the goal. I know I always say this but it takes time and you're getting there. He's getting there. It would be so sad if you just gave up now. You were never the type to give up, anyway."

"I don't know, Angela. Why do these things have to be so complicated? Everything should be simple like a math equation. Do it and get your answer. Done."

Angela smiled, "Only you would choose doing math over making a life decision."

Brennan's phone began ringing. She was thankful for the interruption, knowing she could no longer debate the issue with Angela. She glanced at the caller ID.

"Who is it?" Angela asked curiously, noting the look on Brennan's face.

"It's Jared."


	15. Chapter 15

When Brennan arrived at the diner, Jared was already there. He gave her a small wave of acknowledgement when she entered the establishment. Making her way to the table, she asked a passing-by waitress for a cup of coffee before sitting down. She wasn't really in the mood for coffee, she was just hoping to stall for a bit longer, though she knew this meeting was inevitable.

She had barely sat down before Jared began, "How could you not tell me something this huge?"

"I wanted to and now that you know, that means you already went to see your brother. He must've told you that I had insisted on calling you."

Jared nodded, "Yeah, he told me." He shook his head, "I just don't get why you didn't insist harder."

"Jared, you know how persistent your brother can be." She could hear her voice getting louder as she defended herself. "I had wanted to call you. I knew that would be good for him but he had insisted that you should be able to enjoy your trip without having to worry about him. He didn't want you to rush back for him." When she stopped, she could tell that none of what she just said had mattered. Lessons Sweets had taught her came back to her. This was one of those times logic and facts didn't matter. "I'm sorry I didn't call you."

The apology seemed enough for Jared. He shook his head again. "It's not your fault. I just can't believe he went through major brain surgery and I wasn't there for him. I was off on some stupid self-discovery journey halfway around the world while my big brother was having his brain cut into."

Brennan wanted to correct him. She wanted to tell him that the surgeons didn't actually cut into his brain but had only cut a tumor from it but she held herself back, knowing this wasn't the time for scientific accuracy. "He's ok now. The doctor says his recovery has been very smooth and has happened much faster than expected. He still feels pain now and then but nothing too serious. If this trend continues, he should be able to return to work in a month or so."

"Yeah, yeah…he told me all that."

Jared's response made Brennan realize something. If he had already visited Booth, why had he called her? Why were they here? "Jared, is there something more you wanted to speak to me about?"

"Uh yeah, actually, Seeley told me about his partial memory loss."

"Oh, yes, selective amnesia is quite common for brain surgery patients."

"You say it like it's just any other side effect."

"Well, it is…"

"It isn't when he's selected to forget about you."

The familiar but distant feeling of a stab at her heart returned. She hadn't felt it in a while and she was surprised by its sudden appearance. It took her a moment to find her words. "That is the way selective amnesia works. Sometimes patients forget certain periods of their life and sometimes they forget certain people."

Jared shook his head. "So, that's it? You're just gonna sit there and throw medical explanations at me? You're not the least bit bothered by my brother's lack of memory of you?"

"Well…" She hesitated, not sure where this conversation was heading, "it does bother me but I know that this is temporary. He will remember me eventually. I'm helping him do that. Did he tell you that?"

"Yeah, he said you spent the night at his place last night. Is that part of treatment prescribed by the doctor?"

"No, the doctor didn't prescribe any further treatment other than the antibiotics…" She trailed off when Jared chuckled. "You were joking."

"Sorry, I'll keep the joking to a minimum." He raised his hands in a defensive stance.

"Jared, what exactly is it that you wanted to speak to me about during this meeting?"

"I dunno." He shrugged. "All I know is, the man I just visited is not the same Seeley Booth I knew. The surgery really affected him and now this whole memory loss thing…I can tell it's really had an impact."

"That's understandable. Major brain surgery can be very traumatic for anyone. Any further side effects can increase that trauma."

"No, I don't mean it like that. I mean…look, my point is, he always spoke highly of you and I came to understand why after getting a chance to work with you myself. The way he spoke of you when I visited him today? It was different. It was almost like…"

"What? It was almost like what?"

"Almost like he hadn't just forgotten a partner but had lost a family member. I can tell you mean a lot to him."

The observation brought a smile to Brennan's face. "And your brother means a lot to me."

"Which is why I'm glad you're there for him during this time. My brother…his tough guy act is just that, an act. Sure, he's been in the army and is a ready-to-rumble FBI agent but, at the end of the day, he just wants a bit of company, ya know? And after speaking with him today, I'm pretty sure the company he wants is you."


	16. Chapter 16

"Bones, is that you?" Already knowing the answer to his own question, Booth continued, "My brother was just here. You know, he seemed genuinely pissed off that we didn't let him known sooner about my condition…I insisted I was fine but…" He trailed off when Brennan finally came into view from where he was sitting on the couch. "What's wrong?"

She gave a small shrug before casually throwing the set of keys Booth had given her onto the coffee table. "Nothing…I actually just came from meeting up with Jared."

"Oh." Booth paused for a second. "Wait, you met up with him? Just now? What did he want?"

"He was upset that we hadn't told him earlier."

"So, first, he came over to ream me out about it and then he called you out on it?" He shook his head, "And here I thought, for a second, he actually cared."

"Well, I'm sure he did…I'm sure he does." She quickly corrected herself before continuing, "He seemed really worried about you."

"That's weird…"

"Why is that weird? He's your brother. He should care about you."

"No, Bones, that isn't how Jared and I work. Ever since we were kids, we…we care in here." He tapped his chest with his finger. "We don't…talk about it. Brothers don't do that kinda stuff."

"Well, the situation at hand is a little different, Booth. You just went through brain surgery. You lost part of your memory. All while he was in India. I think he has every right to be worried and to show that he's worried." With a tired sigh, she sat down beside him on the couch. "I never understood your odd code of manhood, anyway."

Booth slid his arm naturally around Bones. The action was done so subconsciously, neither of them even noticed. "So was that all you talked about with him? My recovery and all that kinda stuff?"

"No, actually, he also said something else…"

"Oh, really?" When Brennan didn't offer anymore, Booth tilted his head down to look at her, "Well? Don't keep me in suspense, Bones."

"He said…that…he's glad I'm here to help you." Which wasn't entirely the truth, though, it wasn't entirely a lie either. Brennan hoped it would be enough to stop Booth from asking.

"Oh. Well, I could've told you that." They sat in silence for several moments, though the thoughts that raced through each of their minds had about the same theme. Finally, Booth broke the silence, "Can I ask you something about our past?"

"Of course…anything."

"Did anything ever happen between us? I mean…anything…on a more personal level?"

Brennan didn't answer immediately. After what seemed like an eternity, she finally shifted herself out of his one-armed embrace and stood up from the couch. "No, our relationship was always platonic." Without giving Booth time to process her answer, she began heading to the kitchen. "I'll get you a glass of water. It's time for you to take your antibiotics."

"Whoa, whoa! Hold on there…that's it? 'Our relationship was always platonic'…that's it?" Booth hurried after her and stopped in the doorway to the kitchen, watching as she busied herself with finding a clean cup and pouring water into it.

"Yes, you asked whether our relationship ever became more than just professional…I assume that is what you meant, anyway, and I answered that our relationship was always platonic, which is the truth." She forced the cup of water into his hand and squeezed past his large figure, escaping back into the living room and heading straight for his bedroom.

He followed close behind. "Well, why was that?"

"What do you mean?" She knew what he meant but was hoping he would eventually give up on this line of questioning. Every fibre of her logical body, though, told her the chances of getting off the hook this time were slim to none. Finding the bottle of pills on his bedside table, she grabbed them and popped open the lid. "Here you go." She dropped the pills into his free hand.

"Wh…Bones, you can't just not answer my questions. I thought you were going to tell me everything about our past. Well, this is part of our past."

"There's really nothing to talk about." She replaced the lid on the bottle of pills and began to heading for the door, hoping to escape once again.

"Everyone I've talked to, speaks of our relationship like it was heaven-sent. I can't remember anything about our past but having spent the past month with you, I can see why the others look at us the way they do."

"You should really take those soon. If you wait longer, the heat from your palms will melt away the outer coating of the pills. It will make the pills very bitter."

"Bones!" He gave a frustrated grunt before throwing the pills into his mouth and washing them down with a big gulp of water. "There, happy? Now, can you tell me what we were like?"

"Platonic. Strictly platonic. We were always very professional. At best, we had a friendship. That's it." She could see the doubt in his eyes. She wasn't sure what he wanted her to say. "I'm not lying."

"But, why?"

"Why am I not lying? Because I don't think there's a reason to lie to you…"

"No, I meant…why did we never…ya know?"

"Have sex?"

Booth's eyes widened, not having expected Brennan to be so blunt. When he recovered, he nodded sheepishly, "Yeah…no, I mean, no! Not just sex. Why did we never have a relationship? A non-professional one."

Brennan shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. "I guess it just never came up."

"So, I never asked you out?"

"For a meal here and there but not what you're implying, no. I did ask you for your sperm, though." When Booth's eyes widened again. "Right before your surgery. I wanted a child and I asked you for your sperm."

"I need to sit down…" Suddenly, he was feeling very light-headed and he was sure it had nothing to do with his surgery. "So…I…you…"

"You didn't do it in the end."

"Huh. It's been a month since I woke up, Bones, you think you could've told me a little earlier?"

"I didn't think it was important. You didn't even go through with it."

Booth looked at the woman in front of him. Something told him this wasn't the first time Brennan saw something others would normally find significant as something not worth mentioning. The unbothered expression on her face put a smile on his. "Well, for what it's worth, I think pre-surgery me was pretty stupid for not trying to make a move."


	17. Author's Note: Oct 6, 2009

Sorry, everyone, who actually took the time to read my story and follow it. I was completely swamped this summer and now that I have a bit of time, I have complete writer's block for this story. Hopefully, the new season will get my creative juices flowing again. Until then, thanks for reading and stay tuned! I promise I'll update as soon as I get some ideas as to where I want this story to head! Thanks!


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